Author: crackedceilingvw

Having started life in the U.K., I’ve been spending most of the rest of it in the Netherlands and the Philippines. I’ve had nonfiction, fiction and poetry published in a number of small presses in a number of countries, and work with an NGO providing education for children living in Manila’s slum areas. www.youngfocus.org

STARTLED AWAKE 

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Are you ever startled by beauty, catching sight of something unexpected in nature? It might be the smallest of things (Forget-Me-Nots), or the biggest (this morning’s sunrise), but it can feel like being nudged awake – jolted even – out of the brain benumbing inertia of screen addiction.

A cardinal beetle once did something like that for me, and in thanks, I wrote the following:

ODE TO AN INSECT

such sophistication of red
encasing wings of silk 
symmetry of black
antenna curve of antler
jet ivory of elk 

drinking in the sight of you

full-bodied delicacy
tracing your lines 

of majesty 

love calls to love
& echoes through
our atoms

From poetry collection ‘Dear Planet’, published by Fidessa Literary, July 2025.

PIGLET DOESN’T ALWAYS HAVE TO BE A COWARD

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“So deeply admire anyone involved in conflict resolution, especially as I can be hugely conflict avoidant. Poetry has been my compassionate therapist, my Pooh Bear, coaxing me into an understanding of how I got here: why my instincts are to hide at the faintest whiff of conflict. And the truth sets us free. Piglet doesn’t always have to be a coward.”

The above paragraph was my response to a prompt question, “How can you think about conflict in your life through the lens of poetry?” Each Sunday Pádraig Ó Tuama posts a deeply reflective piece on his wonderful Poetry Unbound Substack (poetryunbound.substack.com), always including a thought-provoking question, which is inevitably hard to resist. 

Writing the poem below has been part of my process – recognising where certain fears came from (and why standing at the sink, washing the dishes is a favourite place). 

Sometimes it’s only once we understand where we actually are, that we can truly start to move on…

AFTER DINNER MINTS


Sky rent in two 

falling between 

soles finding ground 

I take my stand in silence.

She hurt beyond betrayal 

he haunted and subdued 

chasms ripple them apart 

pernicious waves of white noise.

History layering upon

itself, unpeeling one from 

another, an After Eights messy matter. 

No wonder I seek sanctuary 

in soap suds and greasy dishes 

while fault lines re-form 

I mask my aftershocks 

my crumbling.

From poetry collection ‘Dear Planet’, published by Fidessa Literary, July 2025.

BOOK RELEASE

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Screenshot

‘Dear Planet’ – my debut poetry collection – is now OUT THERE in the big wide world!!! (And I don’t know whether to feel ecstatic or terrified.) 

As you’ll see from link below, the AMAZING publisher, Fidessa Literary, have decided to partner with Young Focus in raising funds for our students through the sale of the book.

THANK YOU, Anton and the Fidessa team!!!!

For friends in the Philippines: Fidessa is negotiating with a Philippine publisher to have the book distributed here. More info to follow very soon…

Please click link to read more, also for info on how to buy book: https://www.fidessaliterary.com/dearplanetproject

*UPDATE: Softcover edition should also be available in the next couple of days.

poem: RECENTLY WHILE BIRD WATCHING

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Who knew – the simple habit of watching birds can change your life! And it’s not just about the joy. For me, at least, it has also started to subtly shift how I see reality…

RECENTLY WHILE BIRD WATCHING  

far from being outside observers

            like them 

we eat drink pee & poop

            procreate to finally fall to earth 

dissolving into undergrowth

            dust to dust

embraced embodied

            we join our crew

far from being outside observers

            like them 

we bust out in song

            our chests swell with zing & zang

of arteries full

            filling air with music of our presence

as we squabble & bitch

            flirt & follow build our nests

feed & fight for beloved brood

            with beak & blood   our very breath

far from being outside observers

            like them

we learn to loosen clawlike grip

            from snip snap 

plastic fakery 

            to relaunch into thermals

on invisible wings or perch

            among arboreal arches 

in gladness still or loud 

            to look upon this world of ours

far from being outside observers

First published in Queen’s Quarterly, March 2025; part of debut poetry collection ‘Dear Planet’ to be published by Fidessa Literary later this year.

photo: Philippine Hawk-Eagle

photographer: Paul van Wijgerden

poem: Road Rage

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Self-compassion can play a big role in healing and freedom from a painful past…

ROAD RAGE                 

frozen in flight 
headlights full beam
bearing down on rabbit-me
helpless in rage 
impotency

but how could a child

protect a mother

from lashing tongue

of another

the truck long passed 

I scoop you up

press cheek to quivering fur

in ear’s velveteen 

whisper   whisper

their anguish is over

our torment too

now run rabbit run

I’ll run with you

the road is empty

horizon bright with dawn

I turn to fly

rabbit-me 

gone

First published in The Amphibian Literary and Art Journal, March 2025; part of debut poetry collection ‘Dear Planet’ to be published by Fidessa Literary later this year.

poem: WAKING

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Even if it’s for just a moment, have you ever had that sensation that you’re sliding up out of sleep and into awake-ness, like transferring up out one world into another? 

WAKING    

“Dreams fade with morning light, Never a morn for thee, Dreamer of dreams, goodnight.” – Roberto Bolaño

Breaching

surface 

a mermaid reborn 

to walk the earth.

Dripping

from scalp 

from ocean pressed

ebony tresses–

seawater celestial blues

prismed through trans-

terrestrial matrix 

of sentient

light.

Higher 

she rises

faster falls

these dream

sapphires

of iridescence

into oblivion 

of the 

forgotten.

First published in The Amphibian Literary and Art Journal, March 2025; part of debut poetry collection ‘Dear Planet’ to be published by Fidessa Literary later this year.